Today, I turn 42 🥳
I’ve been wanting to be 42 since I read “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” in my teens. On the one hand, I’m so excited for what this year will bring. On the other, I’m struggling with where I am in life and where I thought I’d be.
A few highlights that have made this year memorable …
This year, I have built a habit of working out 3-5x per week and the results are evident in how my body looks and feels. I’m really proud of myself for this. What seemed like a chore has now become a nourishing part of my daily routine that I look forward to. I am stronger, leaner and healthier, making sure that my body supports me as I grow older. This feels like self-love 101 and I am grateful beyond words for my body and mind, my health and my strength 💪
This year I had my heart broken, badly, unexpectedly, activating my abandonment wound and shining a light on where I still need healing. I fell for him hard and I never expected it to go this way - as we usually don’t with big loves - and that was the part that hurt the most. Although painful af, it was a valuable lesson in how to be there for myself through thick and thin and how to take care of my heart on my own. As I was picking myself up and learning things about him after the breakup, I felt sick to my stomach, tricked by his pretenses and lies, but also massively grateful for being able to cut ties so quickly. It made me re-evaluate how I qualify who gets access to my heart and I put some new practices in place to hopefully prevent this from happening again, realizing that this was a valuable experience in that it helped me understand my clients better. Thank you, universe, for that lesson, for that slap in the face. My heart is a resilient mf and I’m grateful to leave this painful story behind me and only keep the lessons ♥️✨
This year, I once again spent the winter in Brazil, witnessing one of my dearest friend’s daughter be born, moving around through Ipanema and Copacabana and Santa Teresa and other beaches and neighborhoods of Rio de Janeiro, healing my body and soul in saltwater. I spent early spring in Brooklyn, making it a point to meet up with my friends there as much as possible, before I flew over to Europe where I have now spent all of summer, between my beloved Belgrade and the Croatian coast ⛵️. The Adriatic Sea, as well as my friends and family here, have been instrumental in my healing and rebuilding faith in myself and the world 🌸
This year, I am coming up on two years since I started my coaching business. Wishing I was more successful by now, I am facing my own demons of what success means, how I relate to myself when I fall short of my own expectations and how I want the rest of my life to look like. How do I want work to look like? Where do I want to live? Who do I want to share my day-to-day with? What habits do I want to build and why am I still holding on to some self-destructive behaviors? 🤔
And on top of all, gratitude, for being alive, for my parents being alive, for knowing they have my back, for feeling deeply loved by them regardless of whether I’m productive or successful. For my friendships, my best friend of 30+ years and my close friends around the world. For my two worlds, here in Belgrade and across the ocean in New York, for my clients and the difference I make for them, for resilience and hope and good books and unexpected wonders and happy stories and possibilities that we create for ourselves. Cheers! 🥂